My relationship with food has always been complicated. On the bright side, I feel like I’m starting to narrow down some of the continuing mind-games enough to conquer them, but I’m still investigating the source.
Now I do realize that my generation has had similar battles, as we were the first kids to have big words like “anorexia” and “bulimia” thrown at us through the TV. It certainly didn’t stop countless of models, actresses and dancers to starve or puke themselves to near obliteration, and in those professions you had to do it to survive.
As a kid, you don’t know anything about anything. When I started kindergarten, I assumed most people ate like me, came from a similar home as me, had the same routines I did… as much as five-year-old could process that back in 1970.
I didn’t know back then I was a picky eater. My parents set a timer, and I got spanked for whatever was left when the buzzer went off. I knew spaghetti was easier to stuff down than liver, but that was about it.
I didn’t know I had blood sugar issues. I can’t count how many times I’ve passed out over the years, or couldn’t function at school, or begged a friend for a quarter to get an ice cream sandwich in the cafeteria because I thought I was going to die.
Food was always punishment or reward.
I had taken a nutrition class in college back in 1983, and was absolutely fascinated with the topic. To be perfectly honest, I had wanted to become a dietician initially, but was told by the college I didn’t have enough high school science to enroll in the program. I was devastated. So I opted for a Home Ec degree at the same university. I think I still have the notes from that class.
When I became pregnant with my first daughter, I was very aware of the baby’s nutritional needs, yet somehow thought it bypassed my own. A Happy Meal and a prenatal vitamin oughtta do it! I lived on pudding pops and cheeseburgers, yet only managed to gain 15 lbs.
After the pregnancy, I managed to drop the weight, AND some rather quickly, and started my first venture into exercise tapes and fad dieting.
More to come…
